I need a face transplant
Sometimes I wish God has given me a face with softer features. Not that I'm not thankful for a face with no missing parts but people have told me I got the most hostile look that they are afraid to talk to me.
They tell me that I look:
1) unfriendly
2) garang (I inherited this from my dad)
3) sometimes I get the "muker-setep-mcm-nak-kena-sepak"
To tell you honestly, I don't know how to change my face. It runs in the family. I have relatives who look more garang than me...even I am afraid to talk to them. I wish Siti Nurhaliza is my cousin or something...it would be nice (hahaha)...because at least I can inherit some of her soft features. She can be angry and look sweet at the same time. heh.
Take for example: my dad. My friend, Isz, is afraid to talk to my dad because of his face. It got so bad till she stumbled on her words when she hears my dad's voice on the telephone. Once she replied a "Wa'alaikumussalam" when my dad "kirim salam pat bapak eh...". See how bad it gets?
Since I got married, I have been trying to be less of an "anti-social". I do get comments like being the kanda's unfriendly other half. When you have your parents to talk on hari raya visits almost all your life, it's hard for you to initiate small talks. I try to have "faq sessions" when I would ask the person a question. When a one-liner reply followed, there would be awkward silences between me and the person unless that person is talkative and one question leads to to another or else my handphone suddenly looks more attractive at that time.
Sometimes I don't get to talk at all because there would be a more talkative person in the group and he/she would be the one who would control the conversation so I don't have a chance at all except to "aah..", "yahhh", "tuh ahh" and the "courtesy smile/nod" to anything the "conversation controller" is saying. I do get reminders to give a sweet smile but my face muscles got tired and I went back to the original no-smile face. Yah lah, I know that smiling uses less muscle but try smiling for 30minutes straight lah.
Here are some questions/topic that I usually start with.
"Cik masak aper?"
"Dah baper banyak rumah cik jalan?"
"Tak kuar hari nih?"
"Cuaca hari ini panas/jerebu/sejok eh..."
I don't like asking about how big the house is, how pretty the curtain is because only makciks ask those kind of questions...*sorry makciks, no offence hor* Besides I don't want to give the impression I'm not thankful with what I have. *chehhh....macam real sey...zaaaaap!*
basically that's it. *Takkan nak cakap pasal Saddam Hussein plak kan???* If she has kids running around, it's easier...because I can join in the fun and act busy. If she has cats, I can chase the cats around the house. Fortunately now I have Aisyah....I can look busy and I can give lengthy answers when they ask stuffs about her. *pandai tak aku?* hehehehehe.
Alamak...if that makcik has a dslr smack right on top of the table, we would have plenty of things to talk about! lol!
So do you have standard questions to ask during gatherings?
They tell me that I look:
1) unfriendly
2) garang (I inherited this from my dad)
3) sometimes I get the "muker-setep-mcm-nak-kena-sepak"
To tell you honestly, I don't know how to change my face. It runs in the family. I have relatives who look more garang than me...even I am afraid to talk to them. I wish Siti Nurhaliza is my cousin or something...it would be nice (hahaha)...because at least I can inherit some of her soft features. She can be angry and look sweet at the same time. heh.
Take for example: my dad. My friend, Isz, is afraid to talk to my dad because of his face. It got so bad till she stumbled on her words when she hears my dad's voice on the telephone. Once she replied a "Wa'alaikumussalam" when my dad "kirim salam pat bapak eh...". See how bad it gets?
Since I got married, I have been trying to be less of an "anti-social". I do get comments like being the kanda's unfriendly other half. When you have your parents to talk on hari raya visits almost all your life, it's hard for you to initiate small talks. I try to have "faq sessions" when I would ask the person a question. When a one-liner reply followed, there would be awkward silences between me and the person unless that person is talkative and one question leads to to another or else my handphone suddenly looks more attractive at that time.
Sometimes I don't get to talk at all because there would be a more talkative person in the group and he/she would be the one who would control the conversation so I don't have a chance at all except to "aah..", "yahhh", "tuh ahh" and the "courtesy smile/nod" to anything the "conversation controller" is saying. I do get reminders to give a sweet smile but my face muscles got tired and I went back to the original no-smile face. Yah lah, I know that smiling uses less muscle but try smiling for 30minutes straight lah.
Here are some questions/topic that I usually start with.
"Cik masak aper?"
"Dah baper banyak rumah cik jalan?"
"Tak kuar hari nih?"
"Cuaca hari ini panas/jerebu/sejok eh..."
I don't like asking about how big the house is, how pretty the curtain is because only makciks ask those kind of questions...*sorry makciks, no offence hor* Besides I don't want to give the impression I'm not thankful with what I have. *chehhh....macam real sey...zaaaaap!*
basically that's it. *Takkan nak cakap pasal Saddam Hussein plak kan???* If she has kids running around, it's easier...because I can join in the fun and act busy. If she has cats, I can chase the cats around the house. Fortunately now I have Aisyah....I can look busy and I can give lengthy answers when they ask stuffs about her. *pandai tak aku?* hehehehehe.
Alamak...if that makcik has a dslr smack right on top of the table, we would have plenty of things to talk about! lol!
So do you have standard questions to ask during gatherings?
The last time my house had guests was when my wife invited her mother, her aunt and her aunt's children, her sister, her sister's parents-in-law and their children for Hari Raya. I sat in the hall for a bit then tak kena gaya 'coz got nothing to say. So I went to the kitchen to wash the dishes. And thank God those dishes kept coming 'coz there were quite a number of people and they had to take turns to eat since the dining table only had 6 seats. So I was safe. I was busy so it didn't come off as me being unfriendly... or as if I was trying to avoid them.
I was also glad that I got to keep myself busy 'coz while I was washing the dishes, I could hear that they were all speaking in Tamil to each other in the hall. Imagine seeing me out there while that was happening. Awkward. Anyway, they seemed to like the food. My mother cooked. Phew! And they seemed to have enjoyed themselves. I may not understand Tamil, but they were laughing and all. So.
kita in the same boat ar nor.
ramai kawan2 of my other half panggil kita the anti social one. the setep. eh many others cakap aku sombong.naksepak muka aku jugak
n ya...its not that we dun try to strike up a conversation wif them..but if they give one liner answers..it leads nowher too right.
but God has given us this face..n kita pon unconsciously ter setep..camne kan
takkan nak paksa senyum jek sorang2...
Alah, some people tend to judge others based on outer appearances jer.
Tapi some yang baik rupa, buruk akhlak. Jumpa orang kat depan masjid, setep muka bengis, sepatah salam atau angkat tangan pun takder.
So which is better ? Normal face but akhlaq yang budiman or Handsome/Pretty face but hati serigala ?
ah i know!! nex time i go anywher..i bring my nephew along....
jadi like u liddat..aisyah become topic of conversation..n can act busy wif kids or cats..hehe
Your Dad does sounds FIERCE on the phone. I'm actually MORE scared of the way he sounds than how he looks. Takot dgn Pakcik Zainal!
Can't help you there babe, I'm more inclined to talk to uncles than aunties. HAHA. I seem to have more common topics with them. Varies from cars, football, politics *cheyyyyyyy!*, schools, tennis but it beats 'where to buy nice and cheap tudongs?' and 'where to buy groceries?' topics. haha.
OR
Learn and watch from your mom lah.
ntah eh.. aku tak rasa kau ada that setep look or the garang look. i just thot you appear a bit kancheong. probably cuz you walk fast and you talk fast. LOL.
you i have to say, you're very pretty..! weee wwwiiiit!
I'm echoing Toots comments. :D
ptds...when i was single, i used to be in the kitchen, just washing dishes. now that i'm married, must layan tetamu lah...nanti org ckp...maner si dekni...asyik diri kat sink aje. hahahahaa.
yanni...senyom sorang2...org ckp nanti kau nih dah sot. hahaha.
katak...you'll only know people when you live with them.
isz...like you...i don't have probs with pakciks2..hehehahaha...
toots...kancheong? mebbe hor. i tend to talk fast and then all words get jumbled up and i have to repeat myself. hahahahaa...and thx hor for the compliments. friends shuold praise each other mah...btol tak? heheehehehehe.
now that i'm single, kena list all the possible questions to ask eh?? *thinking*
surely i would encounter the same thing as you in the future when I get married!
Fuh, I am so not an initiator of bual-bual!
i know how u feel..
if i dun smile..pple say i look sombong..or aloof.
it's bad becoz actuali i am quite shy...sometimes i dun wear my contact lenses when i go out...
and i am not that good at talking to makcik makcik at gatherings
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